“

It was one of those moments where I wanted the world to stop. I needed time to catch my breath. I clenched onto Jessica’s right hand, my eyes closed tight hoping that if I closed them tight enough I could freeze in that moment. I didn’t want it to end. I wasn’t ready to know yet. I wanted to go to the top of a high mountain and just scream; to let go, to throw everything that was on my shoulders off the side of the cliff and watch it tumble down the rocky edge. Breathe Maddie, inhale, exhale, come-on…

I couldn’t make myself write this piece because in a way this is the how my remarkable season will come to an end. It isn’t that I do not want to share my story, I do, it is just that I can’t bring myself to realize that what I am telling isn’t a falsity, it is an actuality. I was just telling my friend how I thought that I was finally off of my “Worlds High”, but who am I kidding? I will never be able to forget the day, that legendary April day, when we did it.

On April 25, 2010, most of my friends were at home, waking up with prom hair and a trace of prom makeup on their faces, however, my team and I were in a circle in warm-ups at the 2010 Cheerleading World’s Finals. It isn’t everyday that you get the chance to be there, and it certainly isn’t everyday when you get the chance to call yourself a World Champion. There I was, laying, with my forehead pressed to the green carpet in the Milkhouse, waiting for our turn to take the first warm-up mat. I realized that this was it. I understood what I had to do, and most of all I knew that we had a chance to take the title. I pictured a perfect routine in my head like I always did. I went through every single count of eight to make sure that it was flawless. And then it happened. I was next to walk on stage.

When you are watching a college basketball game on television, and the crowd is chanting for their team you don’t really pay attention to it, however, when the crowd is chanting your name, it is a totally different story. The thing is I wouldn’t have been able to imagine the feeling that came over me when I took my first step toward the stage when I first started competitive cheerleading; I just wanted to be like my sister and be a cheerleader. But now, it was happening, the entire arena was behind my team and me, they wanted it for us just as much as we wanted it for ourselves. You can’t describe feelings, but if I could portray to you an ounce the emotion that came over me in that moment, I would. So there I was with on foot on the platform, and the other on the stairs. I put my head down like I do before every competition and then took my last steps onto the competition floor. The war had begun.

The routine had ended, the standings were being decided. I told my coach the other day that I didn’t know why I was a flyer because I liked to be in control of situations and obviously my bases are in control of me when I stunt. Now I had no control of anything. I was totally freaking out. I almost passed out because I am positive not enough oxygen was making it to my brain. If we would have preformed a perfect routine in finals there would have been no question in my mind that we would soon be crowned World Champions, but we hadn’t. One little mistake could have costs us the gold, but in the back of my mind I knew that what was meant to be would be, and I was meant to be a World Champion.

I began to think about my season, beginning with us getting our bid from All Star Challenge, having to deal with a changing backspot twice, winning the competitions that we hadn’t in years, redeeming ourselves time after time, loosing and gaining members, facing the challenges that brought us to our knees, coming out of last season, and now I was here. How did this happen? It wasn’t real; I had to be dreaming, I actually pinched myself, but when I opened my eyes, there I was.

I want you to take a minute and think of something that you really want. Something you have to work for, maybe have been working at for a while now. Now focus on that one thing. Feel it, and imagine what it would feel like to accomplish this task. Reflect on what you have done thus far, what you have done to make it to where you are now. Do you feel it? Can you imagine it? Do you remember everything? Do you believe you can do it? Do you know how it feels to have accomplished it? I was about to know.

Breathe Maddie, inhale, exhale, come-on… “OK” I told myself. “Should I think positive thoughts, or will my optimism jinx me?” “Maybe I should just focus on calming myself down, no that won’t work. I can spend my whole life calming down; this is the moment to be excited, apprehensive, and nervous.” I just kept telling myself, “No matter what happens, it was what brought me here that really counts, the climb.” But who was I kidding; I wanted to see the view from the top. I wanted to know what it felt like to look around and watch everything unfold before my eyes. I wanted to feel how it was to be a World Champion.

The announcer began. “In 10th place…”
Again I thought to myself, “Alright, we can do this.”
“In 5th place…”
“I can do this; I can make it through awards.”
“In 3rd place…”
“OK, you can stop now, I’m good, and I don’t want to know. I have changed my mind sir, don’t tell me what happens. I just want to stay right here, don’t go any farther. Please?”
“In 2nd place…”

Large tears rolled down my cheeks. The beat of my heart pushed me off the floor with every thump. I clinched my eyes tighter, and squeezed Jessica’s hand harder. It wasn’t going to stop. I pushed my face, wet with sweat and tears, deeper and deeper into the blue mat. I remember how scratchy the carpet was on my forehead.